I finished my internship today. My crazy, hard, unreal internship is over. It was weird to walk away from the hospital and to know I will never go back.
Thinking about the past 9 months there is pretty astounding. My supervisor asked me some questions about my time there like who the most memorable patient was, what patient pushed my buttons the most, etc.
I realized something during our conversation. I have spent 9 months with some interesting people. I have watched hurting kids, caught patients doing crazy things, talked to psychotic boys, been tested, challenged, pushed, and exhausted.
And I made it. Honestly there were days I didn’t know if I would. But I did it.
That alone is grace. His grace was sufficient for me during the last 9 months. His power was made perfect in my severe weakness.
I took some time tonight to process and pray and just think about all I have done, seen, and heard.
I prayed that I would not quickly forget this season. That my soul amnesia would not set in and I would no longer remember the days I spent at the hospital. That I wouldn’t forget the patients that challenged me, and changed me.
Because they did. They changed me. In good ways…and maybe even in some hard ways. I feel more skeptical of medicine and doctors then ever before. But I also feel more confident about myself as a therapist…and a person. I also know that adolescents are the population for me. I am most myself when I am with them.
The Lord has brought me through, and for this my lips shall praise his name.
He is faithful.
Today the kids made me goodbye cards. Here are a couple of my favs. (I decided not to include a picture in case people could be identified by their handwriting. I am trying so hard to be good about confidentiality.)
“goodbye. good luck with life.” (seriously?!)
“dear merideth, thank you for reminding me that I’m not all bad. I really needed that. I respect you. I think it’s cool that your gonna be a therapist. I actually also wanna go into that field. Although we didn’t talk a whole lot you were still a lot of help. Thank you very much and good luck.”
(yes, young man I will forgive you for spelling my name wrong just cause you wrote a sweet note.)
“I’m going to miss you so much! You were my favorite intern…(don’t tell). I’m so sad your leaving! But good luck! You will make an amazing therapist.”
(this one had about 754 exclamations and hearts—-gotta love high school girls.)
it’s over guys.
this picture is from a few weeks ago at the art museum. thought it was fitting for this post.
